Calling people attention whores and online rudeness
Hi.
Just a little disclaimer before I start. This is going to be long and not very amusing. It's in fact a rant. I'm writing it here because it's too long for a status and too related to this site, and to the Internet in general, to sort of write it in a piece of paper and chuck it away in a drawer.
I'm genuinely disturbed by something that happened to me here a few nights ago. I posted a status update and was having a laugh with some users that had commented, when this other user comments and calls me a narcissist, a try-hard and an attention whore. A true prince.
It's not like criticism drives me nuts, I have quite a thick skin, but I'm a reflective person, so I've been thinking: am I really an attention whore?
The first thing that occurs to me when a user called TheLastRomanticAnarchist* calls anyone an attention whore is that we're dealing with a blatant case of what Freud called projection if I ever saw one. But this is simplistic.
Am I or am I not an attention whore? I write many status updates, and I do get attention from time to time, and I like it. My mind tells me I do it for fun. Some comments make me laugh like a bastard. But the mind's ways are mysterious, so let's assume I do it for attention. Worst case scenario here: I write stuff for attention.
When did wanting attention become blameworthy? Since when is something as human as the desire to interact a stigma?
In my head, "attention whore" stopped making sense as an insult at thirteen. It was by then I realized calling somebody an attention whore was either childish or the product of envy. When some of my classmates started to develop a sense of individuality and to express it by, I don't know, dying their hair green or becoming a communist, the ones that stood behind mocked them by calling them attention whores. Childish. Or when some girls started to grow boobs, the ones that hadn't would call them sluts. Envious.
Well, I'm going to break something down for you, my dear commenter. Those girls weren't sluts: the others were flat-chested, jealous little girls. And I'm not an attention whore: you're about as engaging as white paint. And it's not my fault.
The whole thing reminds me of a quote I read many years ago, of which cretins around the world keep reminding me. I can't remember who said it. It was something along the lines of: "Some people want to be the tallest ones by cutting other people's heads".
So, dear commenter and similar creatures, next time, instead of insulting people who are just having a laugh or encourage users to stop uploading photos, how about working on your own personality or uploading a pretty picture of yourself? Don't cut heads, it's nasty.
So there's the part regarding narcissism and attentionwhoreness. Now onto a different topic I also wanted to discuss: online rudeness.
The status that user commented on was harmless by almost all standards. I'd said in a previous one that it'd be cool if all the Tastebuds users moved in together. And then I said "Oh, before we actually do this, you must all know that I fart like a bastard". Yes, it's gross and stupid, but talking about farting makes me laugh, as does other people. Sarah Silverman has made a career out of it, so not that stupid after all.
Now, I don't understand how this can be offensive or annoying to anyone to the point where they absolutely need to say something. You need to be pretty damn touchy to be offended by fart talk in this day and age. It's not like I flashed my boobs at some kids in the park, or like I went to a church and shat in the aisle.
But fair enough, let's suppose it is indeed offensive to you. Why not just keep scrolling down or even block that person, if that's all they talk about? That's surely a better option than leaving a rude comment.
I've had three similar experiences lately on here. The first one I've mentioned already. Another one was when I wrote a status about having poor skin because of my period and a lady commented "Oh, thanks for sharing that with me. My life is now complete". And then, the other day I posted an album review, a long one, and a guy said "Too much".
Well, what the fuck is your problem? Does anybody force you to read my junk? Am I e-mailing you my status updates? Do you really have to infest other people's activity with your shitty personality and uncivilized ways?
Not to mention the fact that it's quite a self-centered thing to do, isn't it? Do you think your opinion is so important? You know the other person is even going to get a notification about it. It's like saying "Hey, I just judged you. Come read it".
What I'm driving at is: is it acceptable to be this rude online? The fact that your interlocutor can't walk up to you and slap you across the face, doesn't (or shouldn't) give you the right to say whatever crosses your mind.
I'm sure you've heard this thing corny people often say: "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". Personally I think it's dumb. I like angry people. The world needs angry people. If it hadn't been for angry people, black people would still be slaves and women would still be nothing but baby-making machines.
So, I would rephrase the whole thing:
"If you don't have anything nice to say and the person you're saying it to is going to get a goddam notification about it, don't say anything at all".
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*Diclaimer: I usually don't expose people like this, but since his comments are proudly still attached to my status and anybody can check them out by easily going to my profile, here you go.